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Mustard Seed faith day

The day started early with the insertion of the port and another biopsy of a lymph node that started to swell last week. Last week’s blood draw showed a significant drop in my white blood cell count, which caused my doctor to re-draw before allowing me to move forward with chemo. re-draw showed my levels back to normal but my doctor (I love Dr.Patricia Robinson to death) despite having a full day of other patients, hunted me down to update me before we moved forward. we are unsure of what caused the drop but she is study it and will let me know - nothing to worry about yet since the rebound was so quick. She reversed my chemo treatment to go through the one that was less harsh on my white blood cells in order to give her time to better understand what happened and how to control it. We will also more aggressively monitor my counts more to add to the study (more appointments but I’m good with it). First treatment was an Adventure for sure but God steadied me the entire time! it was my mustard seed faith that allowed me to be still and let Him handle it..period. This is when it’s you and God walking in the dark and all you have is His hand and He is saying “keep walking, I got you”...so I kept walking Forward. Everyone I came into contact with at the hospital was God’s agent and mouth piece - and it was what I needed to get through the day. A few lessons today - God promised presence and strength, not easy! This journey is as much a public reminder of how faithful God is...even when we don’t feel faithful, but it’s also a one on one walk between me and Him. Louis was right there the whole time but this was a day God held my hand the tightest! He was my guide. Let me just remind you that I am not the Bible toting, every week church going, on my knees everyday Christian...but I have accepted God as my Lord and Savior and I have allowed Him to remind me that even though I haven’t felt like I showed up for Him over the past years, He was all the time preparing for and showing up for me. Our God that we share is a loving, proximate, all knowing, non vindictive and promise keeping God! If you don’t know anything else....KNOW THAT!

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